Photo-A-Day (84)
[a feeling]
I had to ponder a bit on this one and then realized today I'm feeling content. I've had a hard time feeling content lately. Well, longer than lately. Rachel is almost 2, but some days I feel like I still haven't recovered. I was so exhausted before she even arrived that afterward was even worse. On top of that we dove head first into starting Jon's process serving business and he started doing home inspections (in addition to his full time job) so my days turned into 12+ hour days by myself with the kiddos. Now, I'm not trying to complain, and I continuously remind myself of the blessing of being able to stay at home with my girls. I'm just stating that this has been my reality and needless to say I've been tired, which then leads to a whole host of other feelings and contentment was not one of them.
But the other day I think I finally kicked myself in the butt and decided to stop being so hard on myself and to stop feeling so guilty for feeling like I never measure up. I've decided to accept the present and stop looking back longingly at the past and ahead in fear of the future. Amazing the things that happen when you change your mindset! The girls and I had such a good time grocery shopping that we picked out an arrangement of my favorite flower and we played at the library. I didn't feel rushed or worried, and everyone is... content!
I had to ponder a bit on this one and then realized today I'm feeling content. I've had a hard time feeling content lately. Well, longer than lately. Rachel is almost 2, but some days I feel like I still haven't recovered. I was so exhausted before she even arrived that afterward was even worse. On top of that we dove head first into starting Jon's process serving business and he started doing home inspections (in addition to his full time job) so my days turned into 12+ hour days by myself with the kiddos. Now, I'm not trying to complain, and I continuously remind myself of the blessing of being able to stay at home with my girls. I'm just stating that this has been my reality and needless to say I've been tired, which then leads to a whole host of other feelings and contentment was not one of them.
But the other day I think I finally kicked myself in the butt and decided to stop being so hard on myself and to stop feeling so guilty for feeling like I never measure up. I've decided to accept the present and stop looking back longingly at the past and ahead in fear of the future. Amazing the things that happen when you change your mindset! The girls and I had such a good time grocery shopping that we picked out an arrangement of my favorite flower and we played at the library. I didn't feel rushed or worried, and everyone is... content!
Comments
Post a Comment